Spencer: I think I am about to throw up, dude.
Spencer: My little sister, Carly Shay, has a crush on..... Gibby.
Freddie: Are you sure? I think the pantless hobo named Gibby that is outside the apartment is who you're referring to, right?
Spencer: I'm afraid not. I'll kill myself if he is my future brother-in-law.
(Sam walks in.)
Sam: What goes on, single people?
Freddie: You have a boyfriend?
Spencer: No offense, but you are the kind of girl that no one wants to date.
Sam: Why do you say that?
Freddie: For one thing, most of your family are convicts and you've been to juvy way too much.
Sam: Shut up, tech geek. Anyway, my boyfriend is-
Spencer: Wait, don't tell me is it Gibby? (he and Freddie laugh hard)
Sam: He is Gibby.
(he and Freddie stop laughing immediately.)
(Carly walks in.)
Carly: You ham-eating, blond-haired, messed up man stealer!
Sam: Just because I stole the most handsome Gibby in the world, doesn't mean you have to be a terrible little girl about it.
Freddie: Most handsome?
Carly and Sam: SHUT UP, TECH GEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spencer: Carly, Sam, you both have to calm down now. Gibby is.... ummm... a handsome young dude who used to take off his shirt frequently.
Carly and Sam: SHUT UP, LOSER!